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Have you ever said that of "either you come or I go? And you have left? It is very possible that you have threatened to do it many times and you have never finished the notice, or that, from a corner you have looked at the impact that has produced in your son to stay alone, as a lesson.
Well, there are those who do take this warning to the extreme, this is the case of a mother from Paraná (Argentina) who was even investigated by the police. What did? He got into the car, started it and ... he left his daughter behind! A cruel sanction from a mother who did not take into account that momentarily abandoning your child as punishment is a serious mistake.
This video is really sad, it looks like a mother gets into the car, starts up and leaves her daughter behind. The girl screams, tries to stop the car and chases after him, asking not to stay on the street. However, the mother continues on her way.
The video was recorded by a neighbor of the place and, it is not clear if it was a punishment for the girl or how long she was alone. The incident was reported to the police who identified the mother and opened a file to be investigated by the Guardianship Council of the region. What the police did report is that the girl was not abandoned on the street and the mother came back for her.
An exemplary punishment? Disproportionate? Unfair? The feeling that you have left when watching the video is of an enormous feeling of sadness and pity towards the girl who, perhaps would have committed the greatest of mischief, but the punishment imposed is so cruel that there is nothing to justify it.
The punishment imposed by this Argentine mother is extreme and is not usual, however, on a smaller scale, it is not so infrequent.
It is not so strange that things happen like that between the whole family in a shopping center, the child lets go of our hand and runs away. There are parents who, As a lesson they don't go after him but let him go so that when he decides to stop, he realizes how dangerous it is to leave your side, because he has been left alone.
Y, In those tantrums in which the child falls to the ground and decides not to walk? There are those who decide to continue the march fed up with these tantrums leaving the child behind. Maybe just a few steps, or even around the corner, but it is enough for the child to think that his parents are not staying there with him, that they have left him alone.
This very insignificant fact or to which we have not given importance, has much more than we think. The way to proceed should not really be to "abandon" the child, This attitude can cause a trauma in him that impacts on his way of being, especially if it is something that is repeated often, or has occurred in a situation that the child does not forget despite the time that passes (as can happen to this Argentine girl):
- Unsafety- They will become insecure and exaggerate the fear of losing parental attention.
- Fear of abandonment: the fear of being alone will become even more pronounced, it will become an excessive and irrational fear about the idea of abandonment by their parents, even if they leave home to go to work.
- Dependence: the attitude of dependence towards parents and possessiveness will increase.
- Sleep disturbances: You may start to have nightmares or night terrors.
- Low self-esteem: there is even a need to be accepted and loved by their parents, friends or colleagues.
What to do then if the child runs away or falls to the ground and does not want to come with us?
- If we go to the supermarket and you want to run away, we can make you participate in the purchase: push the cart or store food in the basket.
- If you have a tantrum and fall to the ground, it is preferable to apply patience, wait without speaking, without negotiating and without paying much attention to what you are doing.
You can read more articles similar to The mistake of momentarily abandoning your child as punishment, in the category of Punishments on site.